


Adorable.

by Whats_your_name_man



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Body Swap AU, College AU, F/M, It stopped being body switching for a while cause i forgot, M/M, Modern AU, Nonbinary! Laf, Sam and George are assholes, Transphobia, and also im gonna make you ship the weirdest things i can think of, but like its cute i think, chubby! Alexander, im bad at consistent updates sorry, james is my trans child i love him, kind of but not really, trans james, where even are herc john and laf
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-20
Updated: 2016-08-08
Packaged: 2018-07-16 07:24:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,149
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7258015
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Whats_your_name_man/pseuds/Whats_your_name_man
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>a very vauge body swap/ modern hamilton au, mostly just trans james and jamilton and james/eliza which only i ship anyway</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. New

Thomas took a moment to comprehend where he was, which was Alexander's room, the sunlight filtering in. His thoughts alternated between "that was amazing" and "I never should've done this." There was something up, a feeling like something was inherently wrong with him. He looked down at himself and where he should see smooth dark brown skin, he saw tan legs and thick thighs.  
He turned towards Alex, who was pressed into him tightly.  
When Thomas saw his own (handsomely disheveled) face in a peaceful slumber, he let out a loud "whaaaaaaaat" that woke... His body? Alexander? 

When Alex woke up only to see himself staring back he let out a high- pitched scream.  
"Fuck is that what i sound like?" Thomas said. Alex ignored him, too busy scrutinizing his body lying next to him. 

"I swear to god if you make fun of me after this," Alexander said, looking down distastefully at Thomas's perfectly toned abdomen.

"Why in the hell would I make fun of you Alex?" Thomas asked, confused.

"Cause I'm fucking fat!"

"You do realize we had sex last night, right? Like naked sex?"

"Yeah but you were drunk and it was dark and I doubted you would remember how fat I was okay!? But now you need to rot away in my gross body for god knows how long and when its finally over you'll never get off my back for being so chubby!"

"Alexander, I'd much rather tease you about the fact that you have horrible foreign policy than the fact that you have the most adorable tummy known to man," Thomas said, toying with Alex's belly absentmindedly. 

"Thomas there's nothing adorable about me and my fat."

Thomas began pointing out every adorable spot on Alexander's body, his muffin top and love handles and wide hips and thick thighs and cellulite on his adorable ass. 

"Thomas do you," Alex stammered, "wanna go on a date with me? Like for real?"  
"Do you mean last night doesn't count? But it was so romantic!" Thomas joked.

"I would like our first date to be something other than us having a contest of who can do more body shots off Aaron Burr and then going back to my apartment and hate-fucking."

"I would too," Thomas said, curling into Alexander and drifting back off to sleep.

When they both woke an hour later, they were greeted by their own bodies.  
"I'm going to miss playing with your belly," Thomas admitted.  
"Well, if we're dating, you won't have to."


	2. Hot.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little prolouge of the night before adorable. Takes place

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay i banged this out (pun intended) because i wanted to get something up before tomorrow morning, cause im waiting in the cancellation line for Hamilton tickets then. Hope u enjoy this and wish me luck in waiting/hoping/begging for a ticket for 12+ hours!!

"Are we seriously going to this?" Thomas asked as he begrudgingly got into the car.

"C'mon, everyone else from work is going," James said, getting into the driver's seat and starting towards the nearest bar.

"That's exactly why I don't want to go!" Thomas protested.

"Just get really drunk,have some fun, and try not to pass out on the subway home."

"Fuck, James, when you put it that way it sounds pretty lit."

They arrived at the bar pretty late, the rest of their group already a few drinks in. Aaron Burr, looking more relaxed than he ever has in his entire life, hands Thomas and James each a drink as they walk in. James nearly chokes on what may be the strongest mixed drink he'd ever consumed.  
"What the fuck is this?" Thomas sputtered after a sip.  
"A long island iced tea?" Aaron said, chugging an impressive sip  
"I forgot Hercules was a bartender here," Thomas said, forcing Mulligan's monstrous creation down his throat, trusting that it would get him sufficiently wasted. 

"Mr. Jefferson!" Alex exclaimed when he caught sight of Thomas, staggering over.  
"Let's have a shot contest!" Alexander said eagerly, dragging Thomas to a grimy table with a suspiciously bare- chested Aaron Burr. 

Lafayette arrived with a bowl of salt and multiple lime slices.  
Aaron readily laid down on the table, letting Lafayette place the lime in his mouth and pouring a line of salt down the middle crease of his abs.

"Who's going first?" Aaron asked, muffled by the lime in his mouth.  
Thomas felt himself getting drunker by the second, his whole body heating up, his vision slowing and his balance leaving him.

Alexander volunteered to go first, expertly taking the shot, leaving a lingering kiss on Aarons mouth as he took the lime. Alex was a flirt sober, and he was ten times worse drunk.  
He looked up at Thomas, the familiar sparkle of a challenge in his eye.

"C'mon Tommy," John egged him on a as Lafayette prepared another shot. 

"I didn't think you were one to back down from a challenge," Alexander said, biting his lip and making a grab at Thomas's waist.

"God I hate you," Thomas said as he downed the shot.

Things continued like that for well over two hours, Alexander only growing more forward and Thomas growing more accepting to his advances. After innumerable shots, Alexander was sitting on Thomas's lap with his hands on Alex's wide hips.

Alexander draped himself over Thomas, giving him a sloppy kiss.  
"Let's get out of here," Alex slurred into his ear, and Thomas drunkenly obliged, making out with Alexander on the desolate subway back to Alex's apartment.

Thomas was surprised how soothing kissing Hamilton was, they seemed to fit together well, Alexander leading and Thomas along for the ride. Thomas grasped at Alexander's love handles as Alex bit into his lip, rocking him closer. Alex shied away from the touch for a moment.  
"I'm a little chubby," he whispered into Thomas's ear, his drunk self having trouble speaking.  
"You're so hot," Thomas said back, the sober part of himself in the back of his mind going into overdrive.  
'Why would you say that to Hamilton'  
'It doesn't matter that its true'  
'You life is fucking over'  
'This was a bad idea'

That voice in the back of his mind was drowned out when they arrived at Alexander's front door, still in a heated kiss that had been maintained as well as possible on the short walk from the subway station the the apartment.

Alexander immediately kicked off his socks and shoes, Thomas doing the same. Alex led them into the bedroom, taking off Thomas's shirt as well as his own.

Thomas grabbed Alexander's bare stomach as things were moving to Hamilton's bed. Even in his drunken stupor, Alex looked at himself with disdain.  
"I'm fat." He said, spitting the words out in anger.  
"You're hot." Thomas said, resuming their kiss as he took off Alexander's shorts.  
Before he knew it, Thomas was naked, working his hand into Alexander.  
"Fuck me," Alex said, handing Thomas a condom and lube.  
He applied both before entering the moaning mess that was Alexander Hamilton. He was as much of a loudmouth as ever, unable to stop rambling as Thomas pounded into him.  
"Fuck me harder Thomas- right there- holy fuck Thomas holy fucking shit-"

Thomas picked up the pace, letting Alexander's legs wrap around him, his belly pressing into Thomas when he bucked his hips. 

"Ah-fuck-I'm gonna come-" Thomas stuttered as he came, pulling out of Alexander and tying off the condom.

Thomas laid Alexander on his back, nestling himself between Alex's thick thighs and giving him the best blowjob his drunken mouth could deliver.  
'I could do this every night for the rest of my life,' he thought to himself. The idea surprised him, the concept of setting down with Alexander Hamilton of all people. 

When Alexander finally came, Thomas realized how exhausted he was and went to sleep on Alex's living room couch.  
"Stay here," Alexander begged, gesturing towards a spot on the bed next to him. 

Thomas held Alex in his arms as he drifted off to sleep. Every part of Alexander was soft and rounded, a little cherub made for Thomas to hold onto at night.  
"Good night," Alexander whispered, leaving a tender, lingering kiss on Thomas's lips.  
"Good night baby," he said, his mind forgetting this was the same man he claimed to hate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading as always and i love talking about Hamilton so hit me up on my tumblr, courtyard-marriott! Also i might do another chapter of this if it seems like people want it. Thanks lovelies!!! Off to get some sleep so i can keep my eyes open in the cancellation line at like 7 am tomorrow!!


	3. Perfect

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beach trip part one/? TRANSPHOBIA TW  
> Also I made this Eliza/James thing cause I love both of them and I want them to be happy but now I'm feeling it

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so i did go to nyc and i saw the ham4ham show (i have a great video comment if you want it ill try to get it to you) and also Leslie said hi to everyone at the stage door and i got a video of that too and Lin smiled at me while he was in disguise which i sadly did not get a video of but overall it was awesome

Alexander and Thomas go on a few dates, both of them apprehensive to start a relationship with someone they once hated. Everything seems to be going well, much better than either of them expected.  
It wasn't easy, wasn't effortless to make things work. Arguments came a bit too often, both sides too stubborn to back down when they should've. But there were many good times as well, times when it surprised Thomas and Alexander how well their personalities could compliment each other when they were willing to work together.  
Under varying political beliefs they found the same morals, the same need to stand strong, to fight for what they believe, to make the world better.

When it came time to tell their friends they were dating, no one was very surprised.

"Finally," James said, " It was very frustrating watching you two dance around each other for years."

"That sexual tension was getting unbearable," Lafayette added.

"With the way Alexander looked at you, Thomas, it seemed like you were dating all along," Aaron said.

"Don't forget how Thomas looked at him though," James interjected, "it was sinful sometimes."

Despite the many jokes they made, the bets they cashed in, (James and Eliza won), their friends were very accepting of their relationship.

"I'll kill you if you hurt Hamilton, and It'll be a slow, painful death," Angelica had said when she backed Thomas into a corner, delivering a threat Thomas took very seriously.

The group made a beach trip a few weeks later, overnight at some house Lafayette's family apparently owned. Lafayette said they'd be accompanied by their cousin, this British guy named George and his asshole boyfriend Sam Seabury.

"You've got to be fucking with me i hate that guy!" Alexander said

"Sorry A-Ham, I hate them too, but my parents said they have to come."

So the revolutionaries, as only they called themselves, filled two cars and drove down to the shore.  
On the car ride there, Thomas snuggled up to Alexander, rubbing Alex's belly gently while he tried to pull him into his lap despite the seat-belts and cramped third row. 

Alexander managed to relax into the touch, focusing on how Thomas's gentle, soothing hands. 

"I'm going to need you this weekend, Thomas," he whispered.

"I'd like to think we always need each other," Thomas said.

"You haven't met George and Samuel so you don't understand," Alex said, managing to sink into Thomas a little more, curling into himself to disappear .

They all arrived at the beach house soon enough, the car ride seemed to go by quickly with all the loud music laughter, and all the cuddling Thomas and Alexander did.

Samuel and George were waiting outside, and there was an audible groan from the people who had met them before.

"I was hoping they died on the way here," Eliza complained.

"Why must our parents be friends?!" Lafayette said as they pounded their hands on the steering wheel. 

The two boys looked disgusted even as they pulled up, and Thomas noticed a Mercedes in the driveway already.

Lafayette parked his car in the driveway and Peggy pulled the girls' car in behind them.

They all climbed out and said hello to Sam and George.

Thomas felt the death grip on his hand tighten when they approached.  
"And you are?" George asked, looking Thomas up and down.  
"I'm Thomas," he introduced himself, shaking their hands.  
"You're pretty good looking for a black guy," George added, his eyes resting on Thomas's biceps in his tank top.

"Oh and you're Alec! You look so, um, different," George and Sam both snickered.  
"Alexander," he corrected, gluing himself to Thomas's side. 

They all put their bags away in their bedrooms, then got changed for the beach.

When they got there, James and Alexander both stayed out of the water, refusing to take off their t shirts. 

"Are you okay, guys? You both love the beach," Thomas said, sitting between his best friend and boyfriend.

"We're fine, Thomas," James reassured him. 

"James no one's going to care, and if they do, I'll personally knock out their two front teeth," 

"Alexander, same goes for you," Thomas added.

James reluctantly began to pull off his t shirt when he saw Eliza beckoning him from the water.

"You're perfect Alexander," Thomas said as Alex poked at his bare stomach. "C'mon, lets go,"  
The three of then walked over to the water where their friends were all already swimming. 

"James!" Eliza called as he approached, "I'm so happy you decided to come over here!" 

"Why are you wearing a bathing suit top?" Sam asked.

"Well, I'm transgender so I wear it to bind my breasts."

"So you're really a girl? You don't look like a girl," Samuel said.

"He's not 'really' a girl, he's really a boy!" Eliza called out.

Sam ignored Eliza to continue berating James.  
"So what bathroom do you use? Do you date lesbians? What's your real name? When did you start dressing up like a guy?"

"You're being very rude, and I need a good reason to not fucking knock you out right now," Thomas said, his tall figure looming over Samuel.

"I was just asking it questions, we deserve to know!"

James brushed Thomas to the side.  
"Let me do this myself, Thomas," he said. 

James felt anger bubble up inside him like it never had before. This was the face of every rude grocery store cashier, politician, 'concerned' parent, bully, misgendering teacher and backstabbing friend he'd ever encountered.  
James's fist collided with Samuel's jaw, drawing blood from a split lip. The single punch seemed to finish him, he backed away and called George over.

"You fucking freak I can't believe you did this to my boyfriend!" George yelled.

James was ready to fight for real this time, but Eliza gently held him back as George and Thomas got into a screaming match. 

"I just don't want you to do something you'll regret," she explained, "even thought that was very awesome and very manly," Eliza explained, looking up at him.

James loved the way Eliza looked at him. Being 5'4" meant that just-barely-five-foot Eliza was one of the only people that had to look up to see him. But that wasn't it, she always looked at him with a sort of awe and respect cis guys had no trouble getting.

"Hey Liza, do you think maybe we could ya know, go out sometime? I get it if you don't wanna date me cause I'm trans and all its just," James said, trying his best to look at anything but the waves lapping up at their ankles.  
Eliza stood on her tiptoes to kiss James's cheek.  
"James you're perfect, and I thought you'd never ask."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading and i guess this is a full- fledged fic now, im gonna do another body swap thing next chapter i just needed some plot im sorry


	4. Never

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another body swap!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To hopefully save you some confusion, the swap goes like this-
> 
> Alexander in Eliza's body  
> Eliza in James's body  
> James in Thomas's body  
> Thomas in Alexander's body
> 
> Also this seemed so much longer when i was writing it im sorry and im angry get ready for fluffy boardwalk stuff next chapter cause that is my dream date

The rest of the day was fairly uneventful, George and Samuel got a hotel room nearby, giving the revolutionaries the house to themselves.  
Eliza, James, Thomas, and Alexander all shared a room with four separate beds, but they pushed them all together to make one giant bed.  
They tangled together, two couples and four best friends. 

Eliza was the first to wake up. She'd had plenty of body-swapping misadventures with her sisters, so she was used to the sensation.  
"James!" She called to all the boys on the bed, "James, I'm you!"

"What the fuck? Am I fucking Thomas?" James said, confused

"No I'm fucking Thomas!" Alexander teased, stopping when he realized he was in Eliza's body.

"Wait Alexander, you're me?" Eliza asked, "What's it like?" 

"It's weird, but I kinda like it," Alexander admitted, trying to get used to Eliza's bra.

"Well it's pretty odd to be a guy," Eliza said, "and this binder is kind of uncomfortable,"

"This is awesome!" James called, running his hands over Thomas's free chest and admiring his broad, tall, figure in the mirror.

"I love being you, Alexander, you're adorable," Thomas said, tugging up the hem of his shirt to reveal Alexander's soft belly. When Alex turned away, ashamed, Thomas pulled him back. "Look how amazing you are!" Thomas added, running his hands down Alexander's torso, to his thighs, then back again.

"Since I'm you, Eliza, and you're James," Alex said, "I'm going to do my best impression of you,"

"Don't you dare, Alex," Eliza warned.

"Oh my god Alexander have you seen James?! James Madison! I could talk about him all day, and I have, and I will continue to do so! He's so sweet and handsome and kind and just listen to his sexy voice when he calls me Liza, oh, Alex, I'm swooning!" Alexander said as be feigned collapsing onto the carpeted floor.

Eliza kicked him in the side jokingly, trying to avoid eye contact with Thomas and James.

"Was that all-?," James asked, a quiet, timid voice that made it obvious that he might be in Thomas's body, but it wasn't Thomas speaking.

"Oh yes it was!" Alexander interjected, "Did you think I talk a lot? Because I, as Eliza's bestest friend, am forced to endure listening to her ramble on about 'James Fucking Madison' for hours on end,"

"I know the feeling, Alexander, and guys it's getting late," Thomas said, looking at Alexander's watch on his wrist, "we need to get ready to go to the boardwalk,"

"Oh god it's gonna be weird getting dressed," James said, peeking into Thomas's duffel bag for clothing anyways.

"It won't be weird if we never talk about it ever again for as long as we live!" Alexander insisted. Alex rummaged excitedly through Eliza's clothes, laying options out on the bed.

"You're really having fun with this," Eliza joked.

"It's like dressing up a doll! You have such cute clothes and all "guy" clothes are so boring!" Alexander explained with air quotes, pulling out a fitted black crop top and a denim skirt with a line of buttons down the front, then going into the bathroom to change.

"Alex take this too," Eliza said, tossing him a lace bralette.

"See Thomas," Alexander joked, " Girls love me! I'm getting underwear thrown at me left and right!"

"Shut the hell up and get changed," Eliza said, taking the clothes James (now Thomas) handed her and heading to the second bathroom down the hall.

As she walked, she was turned around and shoved into the wall in a familiar motion.  
"Listen James," Angelica whispered, her voice hot and angry. " Eliza really fucking likes you, and you seem like a pretty nice guy, but I swear to god, do not fuck this up or I will take your head and mount it above my bed, got it?" 

Eliza laughed and Angelica stepped back.  
"Eliza?" She asked, giggling.  
"Yeah! We switched bodies!"  
"Oh god I'm sorry," Angelica said, trying to catch her breath.  
"Is that why everyone I've ever dated was scared shitless of you?"  
"Yeah," Angie said sheepishly.

 

Eliza went to the bathroom still laughing and got changed into khakis and a black v neck and tight half binder. It was weird having to be a boy and while it was fine and interesting enough for a day, she couldn't imagine being James and this being every day of his life. 

They all met up outside the bedroom door, ready to get breakfast with the rest of their friends.

"Guys we all swapped bodies, its weird and confusing so we're all gonna explain who we are, I'm-" Alexander began, playing with the hem of Eliza's skirt  
"Wait!" Hercules called out,  
"Yeah?"  
"Let us guess who's who!" He said, "you're Alexander, obviously,"  
"You've got me" Alex conceded

"James, you're in Thomas's body, right?" Aaron guessed  
"Yeah how'd you know?"  
"Thomas doesn't touch his chest that much,"  
James grinned, "Well its just nice to have a free chest,"  
"It makes plenty of sense," Aaron laughed.

"Eliza, you're James," Peggy said surely.  
"What gave it away?" Eliza asked  
"That beat you're tapping,"  
"Fuck, I didn't realize i was doing it," Eliza said, looking at her fingertips absently tapping at her thigh

"And that leaves Thomas as Alexander," Lafayette concluded.  
"It's so weird being this short," Thomas said.

"Its weird being so tall Thomas, you're such a giant," James said, looking down at everyone and laughing.

They all ate breakfast and finished getting ready for the boardwalk.

"I don't know how I'm supposed to romantically win Alexander a large stuffed animal if I'm in his body," Thomas joked.

"Well I saw something in my biology course about how it tends to be triggered by something, stress or some other cause, and if it's fixed you can go back," John said, scrolling through his phone for an article he had saved from last semester.

"Let's try it, cause as much as I like being a cis guy i wanna hang out with Eliza today and that's gonna be weird if she's me," James said.

"Okay so everyone sit in a circle and hold hands, and then we'll go around and say something you learned or why you think this happened," John said, setting them up.

"Oh god this is weird but i guess I'll go first," Thomas began, " Well Alexander always seems so insecure but I've gone into his body before when he was self-conscious so it might be that, but I like being in Alex's body, he's adorable," Thomas said.

"Well I'm not sure if this is why it happened, but James just asked me out which I'm obviously really happy about , but this made me understand him more and even though I'll never know what it's like to be trans I hope I can learn to support James better because of this." Eliza added.

James squeezed Eliza's hand in his. "Thanks, Liza, and I used to really hate my body and myself but I've started to appreciate my body more for everything it gives me and there was a time when I would take Thomas's body in a second but now I miss my own body," James said.

They all looked at Alexander to conclude, but he was breathing heavy, and took a deep breath before he started, Lafayette's hand gently rubbing his back.

"Well I don't know if this is how or why this happened but I think I might be nonbinary and It's something I've been thinking about for a long time but I really like feminine clothes and makeup and other stuff like that and I don't always feel 100% like a guy and you can all still use he/him pronouns for me I just wanted everyone to know," Alexander sighed.

Alex's friend's support immediately came rolling in.  
"Thanks for telling us Alexander" Hercules said.  
"Can we take you shopping?" Peggy asked excitedly,  
"I get it," Lafayette said, their hand resting on Alexander's.

The four paused in the circle for a moment, and when they opened their eyes, everything was right. 

 

"This isn't going to change things?" Alexander asked Thomas.  
"Never," Thomas answered, gently kissing Alex and holding his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact i like James calling Eliza "Liza" cause one of my good friends is named Liza (said lee-zuh not lie-zuh) but thats just my thing also hmu on tumblr @courtyard-mariott!!


	5. Happy.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alexanders finds something like happiness, Maria Reynolds is taken in, and James remembers the past while Eliza works to move forward.

After everyone was in their proper bodies, they headed out to the boardwalk, a few block's walk from the beach house.  
And Alexander was happy.  
Not faking a smile when people looked his way, not kissing a girl to ward off sneaking suspicions. Happy, and loud and proud and everything that Americans could be.  
Thomas was holding his hand tight, each of Alexander's wrists sporting Peggy's bracelets she'd lent him. She'd told Alex the story behind each one, one from New York pride, one Angelica made her for her tenth birthday, one she bought on vacation, going on and on.

Eliza was on Alex's other side, giddily tapping him and stifling an excited giggle when James reached out and grabbed her hand. She pressed herself closer to him, and he looked down with a bright smile on his face.  
Alexander never knew a James who smiled like that.   
"Smile more," Aaron said, playfully hitting James. "It looks good on you."  
"It really does," Eliza added, only making James smile wider.

They stopped at an arcade, somewhat air conditioned and overpriced and noisy and fun.

Hercules and Angelica were trying to win a claw machine game near the entrance of the arcade, neither of them really wanted the stuffed animal, but they were stubborn and had already played five times and they weren't leaving without that little nemo.  
Angelica stopped her focused play to watch an altercation behind them.

"I can't fucking believe you Maria! You're dressed like a whore!" A man shouted, hitting a girl in the shoulder as she tried to back away.   
"James, please don't do this, not here," she pleaded as he pushed her again.  
Hercules and Angelica didn't hesitate to step in, Angelica pulling the girl away and Hercules facing the man as they began to draw in the rest of their friends.   
James shied away from Hercules, who managed to change his peaceful demeanor into something much more threatening.  
"Listen man, I don't want any trouble," James pleaded.  
"Keep your hands off her," Hercules said angrily.  
"Don't tell me what to do, you don't know the whole story," James said, gaining his footing to meet Hercules's eyes.  
"The whole story is that you don't hit her."   
"Good luck getting home, Maria," he said, turning on his heel and walking away.

Maria was sitting on a bench, close to tears with Angelica comforting her.  
"Thank you," she whispered as Hercules kneeled in front of her.

 

Angelica sat close to Maria, who readily leaned into her touch.  
"You go to Columbia, don't you?" Peggy said, sitting on Maria's other side.  
"Yeah, I do, how'd you know?"   
"We go there too, and I've been mistaken for a Maria a few times, plus I've seen you around campus."

"Maria?" John asked as he approached.  
"John?"   
"You know each other?" Angelica asked.  
"Yeah, we're in the same Biology class, and we study together sometimes," John said.

Maria laughed a little at the absurdity of it all, hoping laughter could push back her tears.  
"He's going to pay for this," John muttered.

"Where are you guys staying?" Angelica asked.  
"The Courtyard Marriott down the street," Maria said  
"Do you have a room key?" Hercules asked.  
"Yeah, I do," she said, reaching into her jacket pocket and pulling it out, "Room 212,"  
"Would you like if we went in and grabbed your stuff? You can stay with us and we'll take you back to campus on Monday." Lafayette asked.

"You'd do all that for me? You barely know me," Maria responded.

"Of course we would, let's go John," Lafayette said, taking the card. Hercules raised an eyebrow when he noticed 

Hercules shrugged. " I don't know what to do with him sometimes," he admitted. 

Maria finally started to break down, crying into Angelica's shoulder. 

Angelica didn't say anything, didn't need to when she helped her up from the bench, taking her hand. 

Maria's phone started ringing, and Angelica saw James Reynolds on the screen. She took the phone from Maria's shaking hands and declined the call. She gave the phone back to Maria, who silenced it and shoved it in her purse, every part of her resisting picking it up and answering him.

\--------  
"Don't hurt yourself John," Lafayette warned as John ripped the room key from their hand.   
He shoved it into the lock and forced open the door, muttering to himself.  
"Fucking disgusting piece of shit, who the hell does he think he is,"  
Lafayette starting grabbing things on what they assumed to be Maria's side of the bed, sweeping the objects on the nightstand into her suitcase. John took all the toiletries from the bathroom, throwing anything that was obviously James's into the toilet.   
John shoved James's headphones and phone charger into his pocket, looking for anything else of his that was worth anything.   
They were in and out in only five or six minutes, high fiving when they got everything, John dumping the contents of James's suitcase on the floor for good measure as they left. 

They walked a few more blocks to drop Maria's luggage off at the house before heading back.  
\-----

They all continued to play games, Angelica taking Maria over to skee-ball.  
The bustle of the arcade was relaxing, and the skee-ball was oddly therapeutic, the repetitive motion of tossing balls over and over again. When she had thrown 8 times she would fish another quarter out of her pocket and go again, continuing more times than she could count. 

"Hey Maria," Angelica said, breaking the comfortable silence with a more comforting voice. "We're gonna get you away from him, you don't have to see him anymore,"

Maria considered what she was saying, a group of real friends and a chance to get rid of the trapped feelings she'd been carrying with her for years.  
"Thank you," She said to Angelica, swinging her arm as she threw another skee-ball.

\------  
"That one?"  
"That one," Alex said surely, pointing to a big teddy bear hanging from the side of the game.   
Thomas handed a ten dollar bill to the girl working the game, who handed him a little basket of rings. Alexander reached up and kissed Thomas on the cheek, spinning a little plastic ring on his finger.   
Thomas tossed the rings, trying to get them onto the neck of a glass bottle.  
Before he knew it, Thomas had run out of rings, and he bought another.

"Last one, babe," Thomas said as he plucked the final ring from the basket, ruffling Alex's long hair. He threw the ring, jumping in triumph when it clattered onto the neck of the bottle. 

"Nice job!" The girl exclaimed, pulling down the big brown bear Alex had asked for.  
Thomas passed it over to Alex, grinning widely.   
"Thanks love," Alexander said, struggling to embrace Thomas with the bear in his arm. And maybe a few people looked at them for a few seconds too long, but it didn't spark that fight or flight response in Alexander the way stares always used to.

\-------  
James held Eliza's hand in his lap, as she rested her head on his shoulder. They dangled their legs off the edge of the boardwalk, watching the night sky and the waves crashing onto shore. 

"So all that stuff Alexander said this morning," James joked, approaching the topic lightly.  
"Alex doesn't know how to mind his own business," Eliza laughed, "but he wasn't lying, I've had a crush on you for a while,"  
James chuckled in disbelief.

"And you do have a very nice voice," she added.  
"It's the one thing that really changed when I went on testosterone," James said happily. He took pride in his voice, thought it made up for his wide hips and petite frame.  
"And I do like when you call me Liza, which is kinda dumb,"  
"No it's not," James laughed, "I still get a little excited when people call me James." 

"I-I'm-happy for Alex," Eliza stuttered, "coming out as nonbinary and all, I just feel like he didn't feel okay telling me, and it's selfish but he's always been my best friend, but Thomas has done so much for him. For the first time since he came to the States, he doesn't hate himself, he smiles even when he doesn't think anybody's watching. I wish could've made him feel that secure." she sighs. 

James doesn't want to ask if a "maybe then he would've stayed with me" could be tacked on to that. He knew the story as well as anyone else, a letter left on Eliza's doorstep:

My dearest Eliza,   
I wish I would've known I could be myself here in America. I thought I was going to have to marry a woman. I don't, and if I had known that before, I never would've led you on. I'm sorry, because you are the greatest thing in my life, yet I know I will never be satisfied with you, I can only hurt you. Despite this, I hope I don't lose your friendship.  
Yours, Alexander

"Don't feel bad, Liza, you gave Alex friendship when no one else would, introduced him to all of us," James reassured her, giving her cheek a soft kiss, "And about coming out, well, it took me a long time to come out to Thomas, I wanted things to be the same between us even if it meant hiding who I was. Thomas was supportive and kind, just like I knew he would be, but it's taking that step. I was afraid to see everything I loved come tumbling down." 

"I'll never let this fall apart," Eliza said, wrapping an arm around James's neck and using it to pull him in for a kiss. "Thank you, James," she said as they broke apart for a breath, faces still only millimeters apart. 

Eliza maneuvered her way onto James's lap and fell asleep there, watching the stars while he watched her tapping her leg distantly, watched her wiggle her toes in the sand below, watched the peaceful fluttering of her eyelids as she drifted off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hit me up on tumblr @courtyard-marriott or maybe leave me a comment because i live for any and all comments


	6. Lovable

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I finally updated this! It took forver and its still not long or good so here i go! Tell me if i should change anything, particularly James's feelings about being trans!!! I'm hopefully going to get another chapter up soon because i finally have a vauge idea of where im going with this fic! Also i love its always sunny in Philadelphia and had to throw that in there somehow oops. ( the porn is also blocked with asteriks in case anyone wanted to skip it) get ready for me to project my weird ocd food habits on james like i projected my anxiety onto him next chapter!

Alexander got out of the car with Thomas and James at their off-campus apartment, a luxury their rich families could easily afford. Alexander had taken to spending a lot of time there, and James had taken to wearing noise-cancelling headphones and watching Netflix at full volume to tune out Thomas and Alex in the next room over. 

They took their bags, waving goodbye to the rest if their friends and taking the elevator up to the apartment. James was rapid-fire texting Eliza and Thomas was standing behind Alex, wrapping his arms around him and leaning his head on Alexander's shoulder. 

They unlocked the apartment and walked inside, dumping their bags on the kitchen table.   
"Stop being so damn tall!" Alex joked, standing on his tiptoes in a fruitless effort to kiss Thomas. Thomas only stood up straighter, giggling when Alexander tried to climb his frame.

"For the sake of your best friend and your boyfriend, try to be a little more considerate of us short guys," James added,laughing.

"You're right!" Alex laughed, high fiving James. 

"Well I'm going to Liza's," James said, leaving.  
"See you around!" Thomas called as James locked the door behind him.

Thomas suddenly picked Alex up and Alexander wrapped his legs around Thomas's waist. Thomas couldn't help but smile at Alexander's lips on the side of his neck.   
Thomas took Alex in his arms to his bedroom, depositing them both on the bed.  
He pulled Alexander closer, spooning him and smelling his hair, which was suspiciously similar Thomas's special lavender shampoo.

They stayed like that for a while, Thomas growing more impatient. He moved his hands to Alexander's thighs. They were perfect, an expanse of soft tan skin dimpled with cellulite. Thomas started kneading them as Alex squirmed in his arms.

****  
"You wanna fuck my thighs!" Alex accused, playfully hitting Thomas on the arm.   
"No I don't," Thomas said.  
"I know when you're lying Thomas, you run your hands through your hair and it's the most obvious tell, and, your boner is hitting me,"  
"Fuck you, Alexander,"   
"Wanna try it though?" Alex asked, a mischievous smile on his face that made Thomas melt.  
"Yes," Thomas said, eagerly climbing onto Alex.

"Blow me first, Thomas" Alex commanded as they both stripped down. Alex laid on his back on the bed, patiently waiting to be serviced, feigning disinterest.

Alex let out a soft moan as Thomas laid on top of him, dropping his weight onto Alex as he sucked hickeys into his neck. 

Thomas moved down, running his hands over Alexander's frame, and stopping when he reached Alex's already hard dick. Thomas wrapped his arms around Alexander's thighs tightly, anchoring himself.

Alex groaned somewhere between pain and pleasure, mercilessly bucking his hips into Thomas. They reached some poor excuse for a rhythm, Thomas moving his mouth as Alex moved his hips.  
Alexander came and Thomas swallowed without hesitation. His entire body shook with the pleasure of it and Thomas only increased his viselike grip on Alexander's thighs, nearly making him scream. 

Alexander laid there limply for a moment before standing up, pressing his thighs together. Thomas applied lube then stood behind Alexander. He grabbed at his sides tightly, fingernails leaving marks in his hips. Thomas fucked Alexander's thighs as Alex made every effort not to squirm in over-sensitivity. Thomas climaxed, Alexander's thighs dripping in his come. 

They both cleaned themselves off in the bathroom, meeting eyes in the mirror and smiling at each other.  
*****  
\------  
Alexander walked into the Forever 21 with the Schulyer sisters, confused as to how they managed to convince him to go with them.

"Alex, get in a fitting room, and we'll bring you stuff," Peggy said, already thumbing through racks of clothes as Eliza led him to the fitting rooms across the store. She pointed things out as they went, grabbing anything that Alexander approved of. 

Eliza stood outside the door almost the whole time, talking to Alexander and occasionally demanding he open the room and show her what he was wearing.  
Peggy threw a skirt over the door, the hanger narrowly missing Alexander's head.  
It was a soft green material, and long enough that Alex felt comfortable in it, reaching a few inches above his knees.   
He got that and a black top to go with it and a t shirt dress, and the Schulyers insisted on paying and Alex didn't want them to, but he had a dollar bill, a bobby pin, two nickels and some lint in his pockets so he begrudgingly agreed.

He thanked them and headed to Thomas's apartment, took a bus there with Eliza, who was going to watch Netflix with James.

"Netflix and chill?" Alex teased, waggling his eyebrows.  
Eliza playfully smacked his arm and gave him a look she reserved for when he was being an idiot. "We haven't had sex yet, and I'm dyinggg he's so hot," she said, sighing.  
"Thomas told me James takes things slow, because, you know," Alexander said, the two of them getting off the bus.  
"I don't care that he's trans or anything, and I don't want to make him uncomfortable, but I think he wants to, and-" Eliza said, trailing off.   
"I'll talk to Thomas," Alexander said, knocking on the door to Thomas and James's apartment.   
The pair opened the door together, going their separate ways with their significant others. 

"Hey Thomas, would it be weird for me to ask about James having sex?"   
"Yeah, but ask anyway," Thomas said, laughing.  
"Eliza wants to but she doesn't think James is comfortable," Alex said.  
"Oh he wants to," Thomas laughed, "but he's going through his millionth mid life crisis over it. He really likes Eliza and doesn't wanna fuck it up," he said.  
"Well Eliza thinks he's hot shit,"  
"I'll be sure to tell him that,"

\---  
"I hate orange is the new black!" Eliza yelled at James's laptop screen, "we're going to have to wait another year to see what happens!"  
She wiped the tears from her eyes and buried her face in James's shoulder as he moved the laptop.  
"She was my favorite!" Eliza said, a new round of tears starting.

Eliza snuggled into James and he turned on the tv, switching off of Netflix and all it's heartbreaking glory.  
They watched its always sunny reruns for a while, and James marveled at how well they fit together, Eliza's hand in his and his arm wrapped around her shoulders, both of them singing along to the nightman cometh. He didn't want to mess this up. Couldn't mess this up.

Eliza sat up a little to kiss James. A hand on his chest and he flinched. She pulled back, worry in her eyes.  
"Sorry, it was just a knee jerk reaction," James tried to explain, "I'm only wearing a sports bra, not a binder," he said. She moved her hand to his shoulder but didn't back away, and he kissed Eliza, bathing in the heat she packed into two pink lips. He grabbed her hips and pulled her onto his lap, holding the kiss. She tugged on the hem of his t shirt, a question.  
He felt everything fall apart around him. Couldn't help but wonder what he was thinking when he pulled Eliza into this.

"James?" She said gently.   
"This isn't what you want, Eliza," he said. He couldn't bring himself to use his nickname for her. He the see her face fall when he said Eliza. "It was-   
It was dumb of me to think this would work out,"

"James, this is exactly what I want," she said, punctuating her statement with a kiss to James's cheek. "Is this what you want?" She asked gently.

James looked over her, hair falling out of it's ponytail and legs wrapped around his back. A kind smile played on her lips, soft and sweet and a million other things James couldn't live without.   
"Yes," he said surely.  
"We'll take it slow," she assured him, placing one hand on his hip and another in his hair, put her lips on his.   
Eliza backed away the moment before things escalated. James nodded his approval, and Eliza pulled off her shirt. James took a deep breath and looked into Eliza's eyes before pulling his off as well.   
James looked down at Eliza as she sucked a mark into the dark skin of his collarbone, a lacy bra like the kind he used to hate to wear looked much better on her. He hated the way the comfortable sports bra came with the price of betraying b cups that made him want to crawl out of his skin. 

He voiced this to Eliza a few minutes later, having since stopped kissing but they were now laying intertwined on his bed, both of their shirts somewhere else.

"Like switching bodies?" She asked.

He couldn't describe how he felt when switching bodies with cis guys, how upset he'd be for a week after switching bodies with Thomas before he came out. He craved those moments of odd rightness, all of it crashing down when he was Eleanor with a drawer full of lacy bras. Wanted to cry when Thomas would talk about "being a girl" when he was in James's body because then he couldn't deny to himself that a girl was the last thing he wanted to be. Couldn't deny that Thomas's abs and dick weren't turning him on instead just making him green with envy, spoiling his relationship with the greatest best friend in the world. He wanted to hit himself for messing up the one good thing he had going for him, pushing out the one person who'd never leave. 

But that was years ago, and now James was just James, Thomas's best friend, the short one, the quiet one, the one dating Eliza Schuyler, and sometimes the trans one. 

But there were worse things to be, and a girl was most definitely one of them.


End file.
